In this post I will list and explain why most ladies ‘Slay Queens’ Are Still Single in their 30s. Or we can simply title the post why some ladies are still single in their 30s
Some will say we have more girls than guys currently on earth, but believe me the reasons are far from that.
1. Happily “Flirting” With Other Guys
This is not about talking with other guys, it is actually “flirting” with them. You may be enjoying it, but the truth is that, it could hurt your relationship. You must remember that you are committed to your guy and let it stay like that. You may say, ‘after all he has not married me’ but the problem is, you are putting ideas in his head. Guys generally, hardly condone such because it bruises their ego, and bet me sister, you really don’t want to do that…often.
2. Looking For A ‘Bank Account’ In A Man
Every man wants to see that you are trying to take care of yourself. These days, ladies clamor about equal rights but forget to be “equal” in this regard. As an underground rule, a lady should not expect a man to foot her entire bills because he is dating her. You earn his respect when you can say, ‘Baby, don’t worry about me, I will take care of that.’ Looking for a guy who will take (financial) care of you in this day, is tantamount to suicide. Even though, nothing is wrong with that, it can portray laziness and no guy wants to go out with, and eventually marry a liability.
3. Becoming A “Pest” When There Is Work
Most guys don’t like being ‘pestered’ when they are focused on something, maybe work. They would expect you to understand the importance of whatever they are doing. Disturbing them with, chit-chats, romance, or even food at this point can make them very angry. At that point, he expects you to be a little cooperative so that he may concentrate and complete his work and then move over to something else. You should take note!
4. Showing Him He’s Your “Missing Rib” When…
This is a sheer act of desperation. The first message that the guy will get is that you are a desperado. Now this is what I mean: You meet a guy who just says ‘hello’ and you start profiling him, even stores his number up as “My Future Husband.” Haba! That is taking it too far. Guys always find such ladies suspicious and they withdraw immediately. Don’t blame them when it happens, because you gave him a wrong signal.
5. Being “Carefree” With Things That Matter To Him
When you are careless and handle the things he loves with little interest, he begins to think about compatibility. If he had explained to you that he doesn’t like certain things but you still do them, then it is surely going to push him to the limits. In order to have a healthy relationship you need to note the things that are dear to him and love them equally. When he sees this, it will only make him love you more. Being careless also applies to the way you take care of yourself.
6. Using “Sex” As A Means To Keep Him
Sex has never kept a responsible man in a relationship. I know ladies will argue, but I tell you, it is true because, guys can get sex anywhere. And to make the matters worse, it is even free. Don’t have that at the back of your head. If possible, don’t even give it. Because the moment he discovers that, he will know you don’t have any other bargaining chip and so taking you for a ride is just inevitable.
7. Refusing To Give Him That ‘Alone Time’
No man (note that I did not say ‘boy’) likes to be a “Mummy’s boy.” Many men can’t tolerate it at all. There is some space assigned for every relationship. Some things should be handled alone and it really can make someone annoyed if anybody interferes. Most times it is pressure from work and they need to think things through. At that time girl, you should let him be. If he calls for your opinion, be ready to give it but let it end there. Now note that this does not mean you should be cold towards him. It means if he is not game, don’t ‘bug.’
8. Being “Trendy” But Almost Ignorant
Wow…this is very important. Have you noticed that ladies prefer to be “trendy” (that’s the way I’d love to put it) rather than being knowledgeable? You would always see that an average “big girl” knows about the latest phone in town, the latest celebrity gossip, latest fashion trends, etc but not a single clue about what is happening in business, politics, etc. Being “trendy” is good (I’m never against that), but that’s okay for your fellow girls, when you gist and chat. If you intend to hook up with a business mogul, politician, oil contractor, how will you be relevant to them? A man will respect you when you can tell him something about what he is doing, especially, a problem solving idea.
9. Being “Over Possessive”
Every guy loves to be allowed some freedom in relationships. He wouldn’t like it when you inhibit his social life. You cannot just stop him from relating with other friends because that’s an indispensable part of his life. Extreme suspicion is one of the most irritating things you can do to your man. You need not think that any girl he talks to is just your next rival in the contest for his heart, No! It is more advisable that you find out exactly what the relationship is all about before drawing your conclusions.
10. Telling ‘Petty’ Lies That May Not Matter
It is said that, ‘White lies leave black stains.” There are some lies you would tell that could ruin your relationship. For instance, when you couldn’t meet up for a pre-arranged date and you have genuine reasons why you didn’t. Maybe you had a visitor that you couldn’t avoid, or you didn’t finish up with the laundry, tell him what happened. Tell the truth as to why you couldn’t make it. Telling a lie is a strict no-no because he may have known the reason somehow and then the lie will get him asking himself questions about you.
11. Comparing Him With Your “Ideal” Man
You should NEVER try to compare a guy with another guy you feel he should be like, especially those in the movies. Movies are only make-believe and are not real. Most of them have serious issues in their relationships. Besides, everybody has got a different and unique style that distinguishes one from the others. Do not try to forcibly change the man that he actually is. It will not work. Believe in originality and avoid saying these words, “Your mates out there are…,” “You are not a real man. Real men are…,” etc.
12. Having A “Basketmouth”
Relationships are meant to be intimate and confidential. There are certain things that should stay between partners and should not fall into someone else’s ear, no matter how close the person is. Always remember that your best friend has another best friend who has another best friend. Guys would want nothing with someone who will spill every little detail with anybody who cares to listen. No guy would want to know that something very personal is now a topic of discussion among others. He would love you more if you can keep all his secrets secret, and possibly, take them to the grave.
13. Making Fun Of Him Over His Failures
When you are in a relationship with a person, you should share their pain. It surely makes him very angry when you mock his failures. If you do it as a joke, he should immediately know that you were joking, otherwise, he would try to distance himself from you. You should encourage and support not ridicule and condemn (that’s what devils do). For example, if he is unable to hit his mark in his endeavor, instead of making fun of him, show love and encourage him for the future.
14. Being Overly Engaged At “Work”
You may be attractive and successful, and yet completely ‘undateable’ because you are building a career which you have given the topmost priority. As a matter of fact, your life is all about work. If you are too busy to have any kind of social life outside of work, then quit asking God for a man and stay married to your job . Relationships needs time and attention to be nurtured.
15. As Funny As It May Sound…Poor Hygiene
Now as a final point, don’t forget to look good. If you have a beautiful character and good content but your container (what I would like to call, Packaging) is dirty and unattractive, no guy will come close enough to see the beautiful contents. Women who have a poor hygiene, unflattering clothes, unkempt hair, being over or under weight, having unsightly body hair, bad teeth, and too much or too little make-up have very slim chances of keeping a man. Guys are attracted by what they see and kept by what they do not see.
Guys, if I skipped things that you feel I should have added, please add it up in the comment box so our ladies can learn. And don’t think you are perfect, yours is coming next on
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